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Aragon - Script Audition

But, there's only one you need to hear from tonight, New York. I'm about to win this competition. Maria, give me a beat! Oooh.. Muy bien! So, since the day I arrived in England let's just say my faith has been tested on more than one occasion. First things first, I'm shipped off from Spain on the night of my sweet 16 to marry some prince called Arthur. And I'm like Okay, then Arthur dies so naturally I'm imprisoned for seven years. Really helped with the grieving process,

You know. Still, I'm like okay. Oh, but thank God, they rescued me just in time to marry Prince Henry. My dead husband's brother, okay, so I'm thinking, bit weird. But, if you see him back in the summer of '09, let me tell you he was OK. So, seven years later we're still trying for an heir. He's trying really hard and I'm like, (hmph) OK. Then, he starts coming home late "I was just out with my ministers". But, there's lipstick on his ruff and I'm like okay. Suddenly, he wants to annul our marriage and move some side chick into my palace and move me into a convent. Now, I don't think I'd look that good in a wimple. So, I'm like No Way.

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Boleyn - Script Audition

Yeah. It was so extra. Anyway, Yeah, so I'm obviously the winner. So, I think I'll do another solo, so my next song is one I wrote when I found out that Catherine of Aragon tragically died. Hit the lights!

Catherine was a massive...

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Seymour - Script Audition

Okay, yeah, I was lucky. Okay, I was really lucky. I was in-love, I had a beautiful baby. Henry was happy because, 'cus thank God it was an Edward, not an Edwina. I was excited for his first steps, his first words, for not getting a good nights' sleep for the next three years. But, I never got to see any of that. You know people say that Henry was stone-hearted, uncaring, and I'm not sure that he was.

I know that his times with the queens before me, where hard. But, they were also full of fire and rage. He raged and stormed at them and because they are both bad-ass monarchs, they raged and stormed right back. SEYMOUR: But I didn't do that, instead I stood by him. Like I was made of stone. I stood firm. No matter his flaws, or tempers. No matter by doubts or fears, I stayed there by his side. It was not because I was scared or naive or weak. It was because I loved him.

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Cleves - Script Audition

So I guess already know what happened next. How I came to England hopeful, summoned after the king saw my portrait. And how I, with my meager looks the way they are, didn’t live up to his expectations. I mean, it’s the usual story, isn’t it? The savvy educated youg princess deemed repulsive by the wrinkled, wheezing, ulcer-riddled man twenty-four years her senior.

Rejection! Rejection from a king! I mean, how can anyone overcome the fate as devastating as being forced to move into a respendent palace in Richmond with more money that I could ever spend in a lifetime? And not a single man around to tell me what to do with it. I mean, seriously, it’s just… tragic.

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Howard - Script Audition

You’re right, you’re right. I’m going to need all the luck I can get. Your lives sounded terrible… and your songs. Really helped to convey that. I mean, Catherine. Almost moving to a nunnery, and then not… that “almost” could’ve been really hard for you. And Anne! Getting your head chopped off, surely that means you’ll win the competition… Oh wait… Divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded… Oh, nevermind. And Jane… Dying of natural causes… When will justice be served?! And surviving. But seriously, Anna, all jokes aside, getting rejected for your looks legit sounds really rough. I wouldn’t know anything about that. I mean, look at me, I’m really hot… So yeah, I can’t even begin to think of how I compete with you all… Oh wait, like this.

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Parr - Script Audition

No, no. You’re right, I should sing a song. It’s only fair. Go on queens, take a sit. Go
on. (to the band) Hey everyone, is it okay if we try something a little bit different tonight? (to the lights) Hey! Hi, could I get that beautiful light back? (the light hits her) Thank you. (to the pianist) And Joan, could you give me a cute little B flat major 7?
Perfect. So, just for a bit of context: I’ve actually had my fair share of marriages. Something Henry and I have in common… I guess. Though, unlike him, I did manage to get trough that without decapitating anyone. I know, gold star for Cathy Parr.

But the thing is they had this really annoying habit of passing away. So i was dealing with, you know, incapacitating grief and also had to keep finding new husbands to avoid being ostracised. Yeah, Tudor womanhood. Would recommend. And then, one day, finally I meet this guy, Thomas. He seemed like he might stick around for a while. And you guessed it, he turned out to be the love of my live. I know right? We had this plan to get married, actually. That’s when Henry turned up, single and ready to make an unsuspecting woman his wife. Just my luck. So that was that. I had to write a letter to Thomas, ending things. Dear Tom…

GET DOWN

"Paid for with my own pounds / Where my dogs at? Release the hounds!"-

All you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
I think we can all agree I'm a ten amongst these threes
All you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
And ever since I was a child, I'd make the boys go wild
All you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Take my first music teacher, Henry Mannox
I was young it's true but even then I knew
The only thing you wanna to do is...

Broad, dark, Henry Mannox
Taught me all about dynamics
He was Older than me
But I was 13 going on 30
We'd spend hours strumming the lute
Striking the chords and playing the flute
He plucked my strings all the way to G
Went from major to minor, C to D

Tell me what you need
What you want, you don't need to plead
'Cause I feel the chemistry
Like I get you and you get me

And maybe this is it
He just cares so much, it feels legit
We have a connection
I think this guy is different

'Cause all you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Is touch me, love me, can't get enough, see
All you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Is please me, squeeze me, birds and the bees me
Run your fingers through my hair
Tell me, I'm the fairest of the fair
Playtime's over
The only thing you wanna do is...

But then there was another guy
Francis Dereham

Serious, stern and slow
Gets what he wants, and he won't take no
Passion in all that he touches
The fetching secretary to the Dowager Duchess
Helped him in his office, had a duty to fulfil
He even let me use his favourite quill
Spilled ink all over the parchment, my wrist was so tired
Still I came back the next day as he required

You say I'm what you need
All you want, you don't need to plead
'Cause I feel the chemistry
Like I get you and you get me

And I know this is it
He just cares so much, this one's legit
We have a real connection
I'm sure this time is different

'Cause all you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Is touch me, love me, can't get enough see
All you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Is please me, squeeze me, birds and the bees me
You can't wait a second more to see
Me at your bedroom door
Playtime's over
The only thing you wanna do is...

Yeah, that didn't work out
So I decided to have a break from boys
And you'll never guess who I met

Tall, large, Henry the Eighth
Supreme head of the Church of England
Globally revered
Although you wouldn't know it from the look of that beard
Made me a lady in waiting
Hurled me and my family up in the world
Gave me duties in court and he swears it's true
That without me, he doesn't know what he'd do

You say I'm what you need
All you want, we both agree
This is the place for me
I'm finally where I'm meant to be

Then he starts saying all this stuff
He cares so much, he calls me love
He says we have this connection
I guess it's not so different

'Cause all you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Is touch me, love me, can't get enough, see
All you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Is seize me, squeeze me, birds and the bees me
There's no time for when or how 'cause you
Just got to see me now
Playtime's over
The only thing you wanna do is...

So we got married
Woo

With Henry, it isn't easy
His temper's short, and his mates are sleazy
Except for this one courtier
He's a really nice guy, just so sincere
The royal life isn't what I planned
But Thomas is there to lend a helping hand
So sweet, makes sure that I'm okay
And we hang out loads when the King's away

This guy finally
Is what I want, the friend I need
Just mates, no chemistry
I get him and he gets me

And there's nothing more to it
He just cares so much, he's devoted
He says we have a connection
I thought this time was different
Why did I think he'd be different?
But it's never, ever different

'Cause all you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Is touch me, when will enough be enough?
See
All you wanna do
All you wanna do, baby
Squeeze me, don't care if you don't please me
Bite my lip and pull my hair
As you tell me, I'm the fairest of the fair
Playtime's over
Playtime's over
Playtime's over

The only thing
The only thing
The only thing you wanna do is...